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Posts Tagged ‘girlfriend’

To read about how this series started please read the 1st blog in this series.

#2 – Uncover The Joy of You

“You are the only one who can do exactly what God has planned for you.”

“Value what God has given you.  Creating home-cooked meals that are nutritious is a gift.  Balancing roles of teacher, worker, parent, grandparent, spouse, and friend is a gift.  Loving those around you is the ultimate gift.  You have talents and abilities that are uniquely yours.”

“Look at yourself in the mirror today without finding faults and flaws.  Recognize your uniqueness, and notice the difference when you smile.”

I hate when people tell me how I “should” act.  I hate the words “you should.”  Not to say the words have never passed my lips, but I’m now more aware when it happens.  I try my best to instead say things such as “Have you tried” or What about this idea” or “Have you thought of this?”  Nobody can live your life for you.  We all have choices in life and the outcome of our life can vary greatly based on the choices we make.

Lend A Helping Hand Picture from Rishi Menon http://www.flickr.com/photos/rxmflickr/4358918644/

I try to help people with the talents I have.  I’m hoping they find the joy of my talents helpful.  I have lots of friends who can’t cook (or can’t be bothered because they live alone and let’s face it, it’s not fun to cook for just one) so I try to cook for them.  Nothing says “I care” like a home-cooked meal.  I used to do this much more often when I had extra money around for food, lately though the disposable income is scarce….

I’m also an okay writer – so when a friend needed help writing their resume from scratch – I was able to help.

I try to be the best daughter, niece, sister, aunt, girlfriend, and friend that I can be.  I try to help people when I can because I’m a big believer in what goes around comes around.

A close friend who’s had a few major crisis’ in her life and I had a discussion about how you find out who your true friends that you can count on during major tragedies in your life.  She’s right!  Sometimes it’s as simple as being a friend to listen, other times it’s muscle needed to help with a big move….  I remember when I lived out-of-state who would take the time to meet me out for dinner when I was in town to visit and who couldn’t be bothered to drive across town to see me after I’d driven hours to get there.

I remember growing up that I was taught not to be mean and tease people.  If I didn’t like someone I tended to just keep to myself.  I didn’t want to play into the meanness, because gosh knows there was enough of that though-out the school years!  Kids can be cruel and I saw my fair share of it around me through the years.  I tried my best to be friends with the band geeks, nerds, artists, goth girls, jocks, cheerleaders, etc.  It really didn’t matter to me.  (Now I guess I’m getting back to what I talked about in the 1st blog in the series huh?)

What are the joys of you?
Do you use them to help people?

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OppositesConnect.com

About a month ago there was a write-up on All Over Albany about a new online dating site being developed called Opposites Connect.  The gist of the site goes off the premise of “opposites attract.”  I think it’s a brilliant idea!  The founder Larry Wilson is set to launch the site on June 1st.  If you sign up on the site now you’ll get a free membership for life.

Earlier tonight I stumbled upon the Opposites Connect Facebook Fan Page and started reading through the status messages.   They ask questions in their status messages such as “Heinz or Hunts?”  “Mary Ann or Ginger?”  “Partridge Family or Brady Bunch.”  The one that caught my eye though was this:  “What sticks out in your mind as the most memorable, intriguing, special moment of a recent date, or any date you’ve been on?”

LIAR!!

Well, as many of you know I have gone online and played the online dating game.  (And it’s funny that I call it a “game” because my profile always said “No head games!”  LOL!)  I have stories to tell, both good and bad.  I think the most memorable one was with a guy I’ll call Joe.  Joe asked me to meet him at Houlihan’s in Crossgates Mall for a drink one night after work.  (I LOVE Houlihan’s Guavatinis!!) We got together, had a couple of drinks and even ordered an appetizer.  Our conversation was okay, but it was kind of bland and I really didn’t find the guy super physically attractive.  Plus I HATE it when people lie.  (Always tell the truth!!)  Joe’s profile said he was 5′ 9″ – did he somehow think I wouldn’t notice that he barely came up to my shoulder?  (I’m 5′ 6″)  Fast forward a little bit – to when the bill arrived.  Joe dove for it.  Fine, I’m not going to arm wrestle and tear it in two.  I asked him to see the bill so I could at least pay half.  He insisted that he pay.

The Bill

I have male  friends who were participating in online dating around the same time and they always complained about girls who went out with them, got dinner, etc. and never called again and how they were going broke because of it!!  So, being the considerate gal that I am I thought it only fair that I pay half for two reasons.  One – I didn’t know the guy well and felt I should pay my own way.  I didn’t want to feel as if I “owed” him anything.  Two – Since I really wasn’t attracted to him and knew we wouldn’t be going on a second date – I felt guilty letting him pay.

After about half an hour of going back and forth about the bill I finally just gave up and let him take it.  Trust me – I argued.  I couldn’t let it go on any longer because I was honestly getting really annoyed.  If I had liked the guy prior to getting the bill, the back and forth over who was paying would have killed any shot of a second date because he was kind of a jerk about it.

Moving on – we walk out into the mall to say our goodbyes because I had plans and had to meet someone.  He said something along the lines of  “I had a really nice time with you – would you like to go see a movie this weekend?”  I told him that I thought he was nice, but I really didn’t think we were a good match and I didn’t want to waste his time.  Can you believe the guy had the _____ to say “Are you kidding me?  I just paid for your food and drinks and you won’t go on another date with me??”  The guy honestly looked like he believed I was into him and I owed him another date as if he bought a ticket for admission.  Can you imagine how annoyed I was at this point?  I think I told him something along the lines of “No, you’re not getting a second chance to make a first impression, and for future reference, starting an argument with a girl on a first date is NOT a good idea.  I made myself clear I wasn’t comfortable letting you pay – you insisted and I caved so you wouldn’t cause a scene in the restaurant.”

I have other interesting dating stories in my archives, but I’m curious what stories you guys have.  Since I think for the most part I have different readers – I’d like to hear your answer to their question on Opposites Connect’s Facebook Page.

“What sticks out in your mind as the most memorable, intriguing, special moment of a recent date, or any date you’ve been on?”

Please comment and subscribe.


Photo’s from:
http://oppositesconnect.com/
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.hometowncleveland.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/liar.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.hometowncleveland.com/%3Fp%3D1876&usg=__T09lVF2dZN0s91KMajUWnpTFdLU=&h=500&w=500&sz=38&hl=en&start=47&um=1&itbs=1&tbnid=ruSYDFy_TsIllM:&tbnh=130&tbnw=130&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dliars%2Bneed%2Bnot%2Bapply%26start%3D40%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26sa%3DN%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26ndsp%3D20%26tbs%3Disch:1
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://debbiegray.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8357a343069e200e55383e6248834-320pi&imgrefurl=http://debbiegray.typepad.com/&usg=__sioXpBWvLl7ydyjdNEp9lQxB3-8=&h=250&w=250&sz=12&hl=en&start=21&um=1&itbs=1&tbnid=EKzI9tcRV6FZ6M:&tbnh=111&tbnw=111&prev=/images%3Fq%3DHoulihan%2527s%2BDinner%2BCheck%26start%3D20%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26sa%3DN%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26ndsp%3D20%26tbs%3Disch:1

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Do you have a safety net/backup plan?

Hypothetically…  you’re a guy in a one-sided relationship.  You wonder if you’re your girlfriend’s “backup plan.”  then you start to wonder if YOU should have a backup plan.

Have you ever been in this situation and if so, what is your definition of a “backup plan?”

Please comment and subscribe.

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