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Posts Tagged ‘Guilt’

[tweetmeme] The Weekly Re-cap: This week we talked about my guilty little puppy and the fish in my pool.  I informed you of a rude person who works at Colonie Center.  I told you about our yummy chicken, zucchini and mushroom dinner and discussed the results of the library usage poll.  Finally we talked about Vanessa Marcil Giovinazzo coming back to General Hospital as Brenda Barrett and the Delmar Homeowners who tackled a kid for ding dong ditch.

The Weekly Movie: Mr Destiny, and Batman-The Dark Knight

The Weekly Downer: People not returning phone calls.  It’s rude and unprofessional!

The Weekly Food: London Broil, Chicken with zucchini and mushrooms over pasta, Dewitt’s steaks with baked potatoes (they were soooo good!!), cheesecake & birthday cake.

The Weekly Amazing Fact: A hummingbird weighs less than a penny!

The Weekly Birthdays: Adriane Powell, Tim Niekrewicz, Suzanne Marshall Akers, Scott Carpenter, Jennifer White, William Tragedy Yager, Paul Bolk, Jamie Lubman, and Terry McCann.  I hope you all had wonderful birthdays!  Leave a comment and tell us what you did to celebrate your birthday.

The Weekly Craft: I miss having time to do crafts….

The Weekly Activity: Searching for a job, interviewing and going to Michael’s gallery reception.

The Weekly new people I’ve found on Twitter: 5 Below, Red Robin, Will King, Ritter Sport, Marilyn Elmore, Dutchess County Fair, Vista Print, and NYSLabor.

The Weekly Charity I’m Pimping: As part of the Albany restaurant Dale Miller’s ongoing series of fundraising cocktail parties for area nonprofits, Kristi Gustafson and Steve Barnes will be guest bartenders from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. on Monday July 26th.  Dale Miller will donate 25 percent of the food and beverage sales in the bar during that time to Equinox Inc., the community-services agency best known for its Thanksgiving dinner.  You can RSVP on Facebook here.

The Weekly Countdown: 482 days until Breaking Dawn is released. How excited are you for this movie??

Weekly Grand Totals: I was awake for 36 hours straight and I finally crashed around midnight last night – hence why the weeklies are being published a bit later than usual.  Than you for your understanding.

What are you doing this weekend?
Please comment and subscribe.

Raindrop image from:  http://whiteboydancefloor.blogspot.com/2008/06/rain-rain-go-away-come-again-another.html
Hummingbird image from: http://animals.howstuffworks.com/birds/hummingbird-sex.htm
Birthday cake image from: http://www.toward-the-goal.net/2007/06/

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Teen’s father calls incident ‘regrettable’

Update: Parent of teen in prank controversy speaks

UPDATED: Homeowner charged in apparent doorbell ditch incident

Ridiculous charges against Delmar homeowner

Lawyer: Bethlehem man “terrified” before tackling teen

All the above news stories and blogs have been online.  I’m sure there are more but these are the ones I’ve found so far.  Twitter is going crazy talking about this story.

The basic gist of the story is – 4 local teenage boys who were having a sleepover decided to play “ding dong ditch.”  In this instance the front doorbell was rang while someone pounded on the back door.  The homeowner saw shadows through his windows and decided to disarm his home alarm system and run out his door and attack one of the kids.  The stories say that he attacked the kid off of his property and then hauled him inside his house while he called the police.  In the man’s interview he claims that he was terrified for his family.

Here’s my take on this whole thing.

  • The kids should be punished by their parents.
  • They are guilty of ringing a doorbell and banging on a door.  (Not illegal last I checked)

People keep calling these kids “intruders.”

Main Entry: in·trude Pronunciation: \in-ˈtrüd\ Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): in·trud·ed; in·trud·ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Latin intrudere to thrust in, from in- + trudere to thrust — more at threat
Date: 15th century

intransitive verb 1 : to thrust oneself in without invitation, permission, or welcome
2
: to enter as a geological intrusiontransitive verb

1 : to thrust or force in or upon someone or something especially without permission, welcome, or fitness <intruded himself into their lives>

2 : to cause to enter as if by force

in·trud·er noun

  • I would love to know what is technical trespassing.  Does the law state that no trespassing signs need to be posted in order to press trespassing charges?  I agree the kids were trespassing.
  • These kids were NOT intruders.  From all the accounts that I’ve read these kids did not vandalize anything and made NO attempt to enter the house.
  • MY BIGGEST ISSUE – The homeowner states during his interviews that he was “terrified” for his family.  This guys does not know TERROR!  If he did he wouldn’t have ever disarmed his alarm system (as the news said he did) and opened a door.  He would have kept the alarm armed and called the police.  He opened the door and chased the kid while in his underwear.  I wonder if he locked the door behind him??  If he DIDN’T he just put his family in danger because the other 3 kids could have entered and harmed his family if that was the true intention which I don’t believe for a minute was the intention of these boys.  True terror doesn’t run towards the threat.
  • After tackling the kid, the homeowner hauled him into his house and told him he’d kill him if he said one word while he called the police.  IMHO – this is kidnapping.  At that point the homeowner had to know it was a kid in front of him.  Bringing him inside the house against his will shouldn’t have happened.  Go to the door, yell to your wife to call 911, that would have made this situation a little better.  Then the homeowner threatened the kid with death.

At the end of the day, the kids pulled a prank.  The kid who was caught was mouthy.  Kids will be kids.  Ground them, and punish them severely.  (Don’t go on a bad parenting tangent – none of us know how these kids will be punished)  The homeowner needs to be accountable for his actions.  He’s an adult.  He injured a child.  He intentionally threatened the child.  He should have called 911 and let the police handle the situation.

Another thought to ponder – Hypothetically, if the kid didn’t get tackled, but got picked up by the police, then released and went home.  If his parents hit him as punishment, everyone would be crying child abuse right now.  Remember that.

This kid had poor judgment.  That still doesn’t excuse the fact that the homeowner who is an adult made extremely poor choices given the circumstances.

**These are my opinions – I am VERY aware that most people have differing opinions.  I’m not writing this to start a big debate or an argument.  I am writing this to put a differing point of view out there for people to consider.  Because of this, this blog is closed to comments**

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My good friend Cute~Ella wrote a blog today about not being so good about being present.

Like her I am guilty of multi-tasking in my mind.  I think most people tend to let their mind go in different directions while engaging in conversations with others.  I don’t do it to be rude, it’s just hard to turn the other tracks of my mind off.  I find it helps to keep a notepad around to jot down ideas because I’m better at letting the thoughts go if I know I have them documented somewhere and I can refer to them later.

Cute~Ella asked the question can she learn to be just in the moment?

Years ago a friend stated the words:

Live in the moment and don’t keep score.

I have always done my best to remember those words.  He meant it more in the “don’t think of the consequences or guilt of your actions” kind of sense, but I think it also applies to the “being present” concept.

So for today
Don’t think about the extra calories
Don’t worry about being 5 minutes late
Don’t worry about getting wet in the rain
Don’t worry about tomorrow’s blog topic
Don’t think about what other people will think

Tell those that you care about that you love them
you never know if you possibly won’t get another chance….

What have you done lately while living in the moment?

Please comment and subscribe.

Photos from: http://jeremyfoster.blogspot.com/2009/05/take-deep-breath-you-are-alive.html
http://blog.shaneandpeter.com/2007/11/03/the-million-dollar-question/
and http://www.nostalgictreasures.com/Dance%20and%20Shine/dance_shine.html

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OppositesConnect.com

About a month ago there was a write-up on All Over Albany about a new online dating site being developed called Opposites Connect.  The gist of the site goes off the premise of “opposites attract.”  I think it’s a brilliant idea!  The founder Larry Wilson is set to launch the site on June 1st.  If you sign up on the site now you’ll get a free membership for life.

Earlier tonight I stumbled upon the Opposites Connect Facebook Fan Page and started reading through the status messages.   They ask questions in their status messages such as “Heinz or Hunts?”  “Mary Ann or Ginger?”  “Partridge Family or Brady Bunch.”  The one that caught my eye though was this:  “What sticks out in your mind as the most memorable, intriguing, special moment of a recent date, or any date you’ve been on?”

LIAR!!

Well, as many of you know I have gone online and played the online dating game.  (And it’s funny that I call it a “game” because my profile always said “No head games!”  LOL!)  I have stories to tell, both good and bad.  I think the most memorable one was with a guy I’ll call Joe.  Joe asked me to meet him at Houlihan’s in Crossgates Mall for a drink one night after work.  (I LOVE Houlihan’s Guavatinis!!) We got together, had a couple of drinks and even ordered an appetizer.  Our conversation was okay, but it was kind of bland and I really didn’t find the guy super physically attractive.  Plus I HATE it when people lie.  (Always tell the truth!!)  Joe’s profile said he was 5′ 9″ – did he somehow think I wouldn’t notice that he barely came up to my shoulder?  (I’m 5′ 6″)  Fast forward a little bit – to when the bill arrived.  Joe dove for it.  Fine, I’m not going to arm wrestle and tear it in two.  I asked him to see the bill so I could at least pay half.  He insisted that he pay.

The Bill

I have male  friends who were participating in online dating around the same time and they always complained about girls who went out with them, got dinner, etc. and never called again and how they were going broke because of it!!  So, being the considerate gal that I am I thought it only fair that I pay half for two reasons.  One – I didn’t know the guy well and felt I should pay my own way.  I didn’t want to feel as if I “owed” him anything.  Two – Since I really wasn’t attracted to him and knew we wouldn’t be going on a second date – I felt guilty letting him pay.

After about half an hour of going back and forth about the bill I finally just gave up and let him take it.  Trust me – I argued.  I couldn’t let it go on any longer because I was honestly getting really annoyed.  If I had liked the guy prior to getting the bill, the back and forth over who was paying would have killed any shot of a second date because he was kind of a jerk about it.

Moving on – we walk out into the mall to say our goodbyes because I had plans and had to meet someone.  He said something along the lines of  “I had a really nice time with you – would you like to go see a movie this weekend?”  I told him that I thought he was nice, but I really didn’t think we were a good match and I didn’t want to waste his time.  Can you believe the guy had the _____ to say “Are you kidding me?  I just paid for your food and drinks and you won’t go on another date with me??”  The guy honestly looked like he believed I was into him and I owed him another date as if he bought a ticket for admission.  Can you imagine how annoyed I was at this point?  I think I told him something along the lines of “No, you’re not getting a second chance to make a first impression, and for future reference, starting an argument with a girl on a first date is NOT a good idea.  I made myself clear I wasn’t comfortable letting you pay – you insisted and I caved so you wouldn’t cause a scene in the restaurant.”

I have other interesting dating stories in my archives, but I’m curious what stories you guys have.  Since I think for the most part I have different readers – I’d like to hear your answer to their question on Opposites Connect’s Facebook Page.

“What sticks out in your mind as the most memorable, intriguing, special moment of a recent date, or any date you’ve been on?”

Please comment and subscribe.


Photo’s from:
http://oppositesconnect.com/
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.hometowncleveland.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/liar.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.hometowncleveland.com/%3Fp%3D1876&usg=__T09lVF2dZN0s91KMajUWnpTFdLU=&h=500&w=500&sz=38&hl=en&start=47&um=1&itbs=1&tbnid=ruSYDFy_TsIllM:&tbnh=130&tbnw=130&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dliars%2Bneed%2Bnot%2Bapply%26start%3D40%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26sa%3DN%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26ndsp%3D20%26tbs%3Disch:1
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://debbiegray.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8357a343069e200e55383e6248834-320pi&imgrefurl=http://debbiegray.typepad.com/&usg=__sioXpBWvLl7ydyjdNEp9lQxB3-8=&h=250&w=250&sz=12&hl=en&start=21&um=1&itbs=1&tbnid=EKzI9tcRV6FZ6M:&tbnh=111&tbnw=111&prev=/images%3Fq%3DHoulihan%2527s%2BDinner%2BCheck%26start%3D20%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26sa%3DN%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26ndsp%3D20%26tbs%3Disch:1

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Exhibit A: The initial evidence

Last night Michael and I ran out for about half an hour to go to the grocery store to grab something quick for dinner.  When we came back I wandered out to the living room and I found the above piece of cellophane on the living room floor.  It has some print on it which was part of an ingredient list, but I couldn’t figure out what it came from.  I figured it was just something that got dropped and put it into the trash.

A few minutes later I walked back out into the living room and I discovered this:

Exhibit B: More Evidence

I went searching for the little one….  Does she look guilty to you?

My 1st witness....

Miss Isabella – did you climb up onto the couch and jump onto the coffee table to steal the fortune cookie that your Daddy didn’t eat 3 days ago when we had Chinese food for dinner?  (Naughty Daddy for leaving such tempting goodies where little a certain little doggy can get to them….)

Exhibit C: The fortune

“Yes Mommy” replied the little puppy.  At least she was smart enough not to eat the fortune.
“You could realize solid gains today.”

GUILTY

Little Miss Isabella is GUILTY as charged!!  Naughty girl!  Naughty Daddy!
Good thing she’s cute!!

What naughty shenanigans have your pets gotten into??

Please comment and subscribe.

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In yesterday’s blog I mentioned guilt.  So today let’s talk about regret.
Let’s start by defining the word regret:

Regret
Pronunciation: \ri-ˈgret\  Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): re·gret·ted; re·gret·ting
Etymology: Middle English regretten, from Anglo-French regreter, from re- + -greter (perhaps of Germanic origin; akin to Old Norse grāta to weep) 
Date: 14th century
transitive verb
1 a : to mourn the loss or death of b : to miss very much
2
: to be very sorry for s his mistakes>intransitive verb : to experience regret
re·gret·ter noun

To me regret is always a bad thing.  I think about regret from the perspective of the Space Time Continuum.  As it was presented in Back To The Future.  The basic concept of the Space Time Continuum is that all events in life lead to other events in life.  If one event in the past is changed for any reason, it could effect all future outcomes.  In the movie if Marty McFly’s parents didn’t go to The Enchantment Under The Sea dance and kiss, they wouldn’t get married and therefore Marty wouldn’t be born.  All events that would happen because of the kiss.

I’ve been asked numerous times throughout my lifetime if I regret certain things.  The answer is always No.

Do I regret getting married? Nope.  If I hadn’t gotten married I wouldn’t have moved to Upstate NY to hideout from my ex, and therefore I wouldn’t know the many great friends I have today.

Do I regret quitting my job to travel Europe? HELL No!  First off how many people at 24 can say they’ve been to 10 different countries?  Second off, if I hadn’t done that I probably wouldn’t have ended up moving to Pittsburgh after and wouldn’t know all my wonderful friends down there.  I haven’t kept in touch with many of them, but the few that I do are precious to me.  I count one of them as one of my closest friends!

Do I regret dating _______? (insert any name of one of my ex boyfriends) Nope.  They’re all ex boyfriends for a reason.  I learned something from every single one of them.  Even the bad stuff was good to go through to learn from.  The jerk that beat the crap out of me made me a stronger woman who would NEVER tolerate that crap in my life.  The jerk with the head on a swivel – I learned that I was so much better than him.  (He’s now married and I pity his wife)  I’ve learned that some men just can’t get out of their own way to be happy.  Then there was the good stuff.  The guy who taught me to make kick-ass pizza.  The guy who loved to watch movies that opened me up to some I would have never picked up to watch.  The guy who loved to travel.  The guys who loved riding motorcycles.  I learned from them all 🙂

Do I regret taking that last job that totally screwed me over? I’m still trying to learn from that one….  I’ve learned to be more frugal, that’s for sure….

So I ask you all this.  What do people think you’d regret in your life and why don’t you regret it?

Please subscribe and comment….  🙂

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Helen Keller Quote about Happiness

I get forwards all the time from various friends of mine.  Most of them I’ve seen over and over and over….
I don’t think I’ve ever seen this one and it caught my eye.
I would change the title of it though to How to Have a Happier Life
I’ll leave my comments in parenthesis and italics

HOW TO STAY YOUNG

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay ‘them’
(Why do we care so much about these things.  Weight I can understand a little bit.  A person can change their weight with some effort.  Stressing about age and height though…  these are two things in your life that no matter how hard you try you will not change, so why waste the energy?)

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
(I tell all my friends “rid your life of toxic people and do whatever you can to keep toxic people out of your life.”)

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. ‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’
(I like this one ALOT!!  Sometimes learning something from a child is kinda cool too….)

4. Enjoy the simple things.
(Like listening to nature around you.  Hugging the one’s you love.  Smiling at a stranger and watching it make their day.  Read a book.  Write a blog.)

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
(Make sure you really mean it though.  When all else fails find something on comedy central or call my friend Scott, he can make almost anyone laugh….)

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
(It’s okay to cry.  Use them to heal yourself, but don’t dwell on the bad things….)

7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it’s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
(This is another great one!  Friends, family, pets, motorcycles etc….)

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
(This means quit smoking and try to eat a little bit healthier than you used to.  I’ve been trying to cook more new things and sometimes it helps.)

9. Don’t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.
(To me guilt is worthless.  Remind yourself why what you did was wrong, and do your best not to repeat the mistake.  Dwelling on it won’t change it, just vow to be better in the future.)

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
(This is one of the most important on the list.  Always tell those you love that you do love them every chance you get because you might not get another chance.  You don’t ever want to lose someone and then later wonder if they knew that they were loved….)

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER :
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Worry about nothing, pray about everything!!!

I hope you all enjoyed this.
Please subscribe in the upper right and then drop me a comment.

What advice do you have to share to have a happier life?
What makes you happy?

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